Monday, October 26, 2009

A little bit about coming out

Posted on 11:27 PM by Charlie Milwall

a questionnaire taken from scousewemboy of roomlovely.

Country: United Kingdom

How old were you when you first realised you were gay? 10. not necessarily knowing the word gay, but i knew i liked boys more than girls.

Do you have more gay friends or straight friends? more straight friends, but i don't choose my friends because they're gay or straight.

Biggest turn on? a really nice smile and beautiful eyes. a good sense of humour is always a plus.

Biggest turn off? arrogance and vanity

Ever been harassed due to your orientation? when i was younger in school, i was teased, but my friends always backed me up so the teasing quickly stopped. i've not been teased since i was 15 probably.

Have you ever been surprised at the reaction of people who know you are gay? some were surprised, some said they suspected, but most were supportive.

What is the worst gay stereotype? promiscuity. there may be some who are promiscuous, but most gay guys can be monogamous, fall in love, and have stable and lasting relationships.

Are you a stereotype? i don't think so. i'm just being me, so if that seems like a stereotype to someone else, then so be it.

Ever been to a pride rally? oh yeah. san francisco, london, brighton. they're always a blast! one day, i will make it to the one in sydney. i've heard good things about it.

Do you go to gay bars? very rarely. i just don't go to bars that often to start with. and when i do, i don't focus on gay bars. although i do enjoy going to drag shows. they're quite fun!

How old were you when you first told someone you were gay? 16, going on 17.

Did you plan it? yes and no. i had been thinking about it, and wanted to come out, but i didn't want to initiate it. i just waited for the right moment when a friend of mine asked me at a party.

What made you choose that person to tell? i was asked by that person, and i'd been wanting to come out. she asked, i answered honestly.

How did you feel? let's just say, i couldn't stop smiling for days. :)

Have you ever been snubbed by someone after coming out to them? two people did, but i had already been out for a few years. so it didn't bother me that much. i had only known them for less than a year.

Have you come out to your family? yes. my dad had a bit of a hard time with it. my mum was cool right from the start.

Why did you come out at that point? my mum asked me one night before i was heading off with my friends to go out. this is becoming a common theme - others initiating my coming out. lol.

Are you out at work? yes.

If not, why not?

If you’ve been outed unwillingly, who did it? i don't think i've been outed unwillingly, at least not behind my back.

What does being out mean to you? revealing your true self to those around you, and them having to accept the true you to whatever degree they are comfortable with.

What advice would you give someone wanting to come out? do it at your own pace, and trust your instincts when it comes to identifying a true confidante. only do it when you've got a clear head, not when you're drunk, stoned, etc.

If you could do it all again, would you do it any differently? i would have liked to have told my parents first.

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