Soulmates

this clip from the movie paris je t'aime was what inspired the title of this blog. i've known the song lonely blue boy much earlier, but never really thought much about it until i saw this clip. it took on a different meaning. not sure what, though. it just "sounded" different to me. maybe it was the context that the clip gave it. that's funny because it's usually the other way around, the song giving a movie additional context or depth, or both.

the clip is about soulmates, in my opinion. soulmates meet in ordinary circumstances, and only the lucky few recognise these circumstances to be in the least ordinary. it makes me think if i've missed my chance, or if it has yet to happen, or better yet, if it's happening now. a good reason to keep our minds, our eyes, and our hearts open. you just never know.

A little bit about coming out

a questionnaire taken from scousewemboy of roomlovely.

Country: United Kingdom

How old were you when you first realised you were gay? 10. not necessarily knowing the word gay, but i knew i liked boys more than girls.

Do you have more gay friends or straight friends? more straight friends, but i don't choose my friends because they're gay or straight.

Biggest turn on? a really nice smile and beautiful eyes. a good sense of humour is always a plus.

Biggest turn off? arrogance and vanity

Ever been harassed due to your orientation? when i was younger in school, i was teased, but my friends always backed me up so the teasing quickly stopped. i've not been teased since i was 15 probably.

Have you ever been surprised at the reaction of people who know you are gay? some were surprised, some said they suspected, but most were supportive.

What is the worst gay stereotype? promiscuity. there may be some who are promiscuous, but most gay guys can be monogamous, fall in love, and have stable and lasting relationships.

Are you a stereotype? i don't think so. i'm just being me, so if that seems like a stereotype to someone else, then so be it.

Ever been to a pride rally? oh yeah. san francisco, london, brighton. they're always a blast! one day, i will make it to the one in sydney. i've heard good things about it.

Do you go to gay bars? very rarely. i just don't go to bars that often to start with. and when i do, i don't focus on gay bars. although i do enjoy going to drag shows. they're quite fun!

How old were you when you first told someone you were gay? 16, going on 17.

Did you plan it? yes and no. i had been thinking about it, and wanted to come out, but i didn't want to initiate it. i just waited for the right moment when a friend of mine asked me at a party.

What made you choose that person to tell? i was asked by that person, and i'd been wanting to come out. she asked, i answered honestly.

How did you feel? let's just say, i couldn't stop smiling for days. :)

Have you ever been snubbed by someone after coming out to them? two people did, but i had already been out for a few years. so it didn't bother me that much. i had only known them for less than a year.

Have you come out to your family? yes. my dad had a bit of a hard time with it. my mum was cool right from the start.

Why did you come out at that point? my mum asked me one night before i was heading off with my friends to go out. this is becoming a common theme - others initiating my coming out. lol.

Are you out at work? yes.

If not, why not?

If you’ve been outed unwillingly, who did it? i don't think i've been outed unwillingly, at least not behind my back.

What does being out mean to you? revealing your true self to those around you, and them having to accept the true you to whatever degree they are comfortable with.

What advice would you give someone wanting to come out? do it at your own pace, and trust your instincts when it comes to identifying a true confidante. only do it when you've got a clear head, not when you're drunk, stoned, etc.

If you could do it all again, would you do it any differently? i would have liked to have told my parents first.

Growing apart

i was on ichat with a friend of mine. we've been friends for nearly 20 years now. our conversation, like always, turned to how the other guys were doing. there were four of us, and we were tight. did everything together, and it helped that our parents were also good friends with each other. over the years, we've managed to keep in touch and see each other every couple of years or so, just to reform the bonds of friendship. during the past four years or so, the three of us felt that one has become distant. we would call, and the calls were returned. but gradually, contact became sparse and very seldom. i guess this is what people call "growing apart". i'm not sure what triggers this distancing. it seems to me that the times we've shared have lost their sentimental value. it upsets me. the other two and i tried to keep it going, but to no avail. i'm not sure what happened. it seems like it happened quickly, but i'm sure there were signs that we weren't conscious of. maybe later it will become clearer.

to some, growing apart from a friend is easy to accept. i've always had trouble with it. i don't have many friends, and i have even fewer friends that i trust with all my being. i let very few people in to see the REAL me. i don't know why that is. that's just how i am. and if you've been let in my inner sanctum, if you will, you will be my friend for life. so you can imagine why it is difficult for me to deal with a friend to choose to let a friendship like that go.

i think the song "bedshaped" by keane is appropriate.

Many's the time I ran with you down
The rainy roads of your old town
Many the lives we lived in each day
And buried altogether
Don't laugh at me
Don't look away

You'll follow me back
With the sun in your eyes
And on your own
Bedshaped
And legs of stone
You'll knock on my door
And up we'll go
In white light
I don't think so
But what do I know?
What do I know?
I know!

I know you think I'm holding you down
And I've fallen by the wayside now
And I don't understand the same things as you
But I do

Don't laugh at me
Don't look away

You'll follow me back
With the sun in your eyes
And on your own
Bedshaped
And legs of stone
You'll knock on my door
And up we'll go
In white light
I don't think so
But what do I know?
What do I know?
I know!

And up we'll go
In white light
I don't think so
But what do I know?
What do I know?
I know!

Class trumps gay pride

was in the train to london, getting in very late to work. a group of six gay twentysomethings boarded. it was obvious that they were all good friends, and heading to london for a good time. they were all fit, and unfortunately they knew it too. i sensed a bit of vanity. they were having a conversation, and quite loudly, i might add. actually only three of the six were loud, specially one that had a thick northwest accent. i was sitting in the seat behind them so i could clearly hear what they were talking about, and so did everyone else in the coach. at first it was humourous. they were talking about a friend who was obsessed with another guy that they all knew. i guess this friend was throwing himself at this guy. i missed a few minutes of the conversation (not that i was eavesdropping; they were just loud and one could not help hear everything they were talking about) as i had to take a phone call. after the call, i realised that they were talking about barebacking and how to medicate their arseholes. ewww. by this time, i was not at all enjoying involuntarily hearing the rest of the conversation. and i suspect no one else in the coach did either, although i didn't look around. and this brings me to my question...

were they doing this for shock value? maybe it was just an utter lack of class on their part? i'm very much into being proud of ones sexuality. i'm gay, and i'm very proud of it. but i think this has crossed the line. there are just some things that are not done in public - one of them is talking LOUDLY about unprotected anal sex and how to soothe your arsehole after participating in one. i just can't get my head around this, in terms of their motivation. there was not even a hint of embarrassment on their part. they have every right to talk about whatever they want in public, but i just wished that they could have done it softly, without subjecting others to it.

i don't know. some of you may think of me as a prude, but in my opinion, class trumps pride in sexuality.

when we got to victoria station, each one took out a feather boa. LOL. looks like the boys intended to hit london in style. one of the guys in the group is celebrating his birthday. and the party started at around noon. i could only imagine what they felt the following morning. actually i don't want to imagine it.

anyway, i'm glad that they are very proud of being gay, but there is definitely other ways to express that pride. and talking about barebacking loudly is not one of them.

Landscape Photography

Here are some deserved winners and honourable mentions in the BBC's landscape photography competition. Awesome pics! From this link.

SUNRISE OVER OLD MAN OF STORR, ISLE OF SKYE by EMMANUEL COUPE (First Prize in the Take A View - Landscape Photographer of the Year Award 2009


WHEAT FIELD AT DAWN by JOHN MCGOVERN (Young Landscape Photographer of the Year Award)


FOOD FOR THOUGHT, ABERDEEN HARBOUR by JOHN PARMINTER


SUNSET IN CUMBRIA by CHRIS MCILREAVY (English National Parks Award)


RANNOCH MOOR, SCOTLAND by JOHN PARMINTER


KINSEY SHOW FELL RACE IN NORTH YORKSHIRE by STEPHEN GARNETT


STORM CLEARING OVER WESTMINSTER PALACE by ALEX VAREY (Phone Section winner)


HEBDEN BRIDGE, WEST YORKSHIRE by NIGEL HILLIER (Landscape on Your Doorstep Award)


Very deserving, don't you think?

On a side note, this blog is not meant to be a photography blog - only a collection of things or events I find interesting.

Tilt-shift photography

i decided to try this tilt-shift app for iphone. it actually processes images already taken, so it's not the real tilt-shift that requires a special lens for the camera. for the price of less than two quid, it's not bad, i guess. i'm not a professional, so my standards are quite low, when it comes to photography. here's a couple of images i took - one at wembley, and the other inside the brighton dome. the object is to make the subject look like a miniature. this is achieved by blurring the foreground and background, with the photo taken from a high angle. if i want more of these images, i'm going to have to find a high vantage point for picture taking and use a better camera than an iphone cam, which is not the best, by the way. anyone want to take me to the london eye? lol.





here are two pictures i found from this site.